


Begin Again

by PrettyPeary



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alex is tired of his shit, Background Supercorp, Clark's kinda been a dick, Gen, Super cousins, background clois
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-27
Packaged: 2019-09-01 07:09:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16760404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrettyPeary/pseuds/PrettyPeary
Summary: Alex turned around looking more than a little surprised but covered it quickly switching back into agent mode, “Superman, we weren’t expecting you in National City today.”“I had some urgent business come up that couldn’t wait. Is there any place we could talk that’s a bit more private?”“Of course, just follow me,” She turned back to an agent he vaguely recognized from the last time he’d been in National City, at the computer behind her, “Winn, I want that tracking program up and running by the time I get back.” Winn nodded without turning away from the screen and Alex led Clark away from the platform and into a conference room.Once inside he dropped the Superman demeanor and started pacing, cape flapping along behind him as Alex closed the door. “Lena Luthor? Seriously, she’s dating Lena Luthor?”OrClark is mad about Kara dating Lena and Alex is mad about a lot in general





	Begin Again

Clark’s boot landed with barely a sound on the balcony of the DEO striding forward he spotted Alex near the controls and made a beeline for her. “Director Danvers.”

She turned around looking more than a little surprised but covered it quickly switching back into agent mode, “Superman, we weren’t expecting you in National City today.”

“I had some urgent business come up that couldn’t wait. Is there any place we could talk that’s a bit more private?”

“Of course, just follow me,” She turned back to an agent he vaguely recognized from the last time he’d been in National City, at the computer behind her, “Winn, I want that tracking program up and running by the time I get back.” Winn nodded without turning away from the screen and Alex led Clark away from the platform and into a conference room. 

Once inside he dropped the Superman demeanor and started pacing, cape flapping along behind him as Alex closed the door. “Lena Luthor? Seriously, she’s dating Lena Luthor?” He made an incredulous gesture with his arms as he paced.

Alex crossed the room leaning calmly against the conference table, “So she finally told you.”

“Yeah, she called late last night and took me completely off guard.” He stopped pacing and looked at her, “Wait, what do you mean ‘finally’?”

“Clark, they’ve been dating for almost six months. And were best friends for over a year before that.” Alex shook her head slightly and chuckled, “Honestly, if they both weren’t so oblivious it would have happened a lot sooner.” 

He looked at her, working his jaw in anger, “How are you so ok with this? She’s a Luthor, I heard about what Lilian tried to do last year with that Medusa virus. Along with all the other Cadmus stuff she’s been behind. Her brother killed so many people, almost killed me.”

Alex stopped leaning against the door and took a defensive stance her arms crossed with her feet spread apart, “Apparently, you then chose to ignore the part where Lena was the only reason that virus failed, was then kidnapped and nearly killed by her mother who simply needed her to get a stash of Lex’s weapons. Lena has saved this city and all the aliens in it multiple times so maybe you should try to look past her damn last name and see all the good she’s done instead.” 

“Considering who raised her I wouldn’t be surprised if it was all an act to get you all to trust her before she shows her true colors.” He started pacing again while trying to come up with a way to show Kara that Lena Luthor was not to be trusted. Alex stepped forward into his path and held a hand up in front of her effectively stopping him.

She spoke quietly, but with such authority that Clark actually shrunk back slightly, “I trust Lena Luthor with my life. I trust her with Kara’s life. Kara trusts her with her entire being. So, the next time you think something like that try to remember those facts before saying it.” 

He stiffened slightly, “When you say her whole being…”

At this point Alex seemed to fully switch into protective older sister mode and it caught him off guard. She’d always been a bit distant with him, but this was terrifying it was no wonder no one messed with the Danvers sisters. “Yes Clark, Lena knows Kara is Supergirl and it almost tore them apart. Not the actual secret but the fact it meant Kara had lied to her for months on end. Honestly, you have no room to be cynical about revealing that secret to people considering you told James who Kara was without asking her and without telling her you’d done so.” 

His anger rekindled at what was clearly an accusation, “That was completely different, and you know it Alex. I trust Jimmy with my life and knew he would never do anything that could hurt Kara. But, but Lena? She’s a loose cannon!”

“No. I don’t know that Clark, because when James came here we didn’t know him. Kara didn’t know him or trust him and yet he had the privilege of knowing who she was. She didn’t get a say in that and she had every right to. But do you know who she does know and trust? Who she took the time to decide for herself whether or not she wanted them to know? Lena Luthor. The only way the two situations would be the same would be if Kara told Lena your secret and she hasn’t. Why? Because it isn’t her secret to tell.” She punctuated each word in the last sentence as though trying to hammer each word into his skull. 

Clark went to speak but Alex held her hand up again, cutting him off. “And while we are at things you should think through next time, maybe think about visiting more than once every couple years you would have seen this coming from a long ways off if you did and you probably wouldn’t be so distrusting.” With that Alex stepped back out of his path taking up her previous position near the table again, though she kept her arms crossed tightly.

He just stared at her slightly flabbergasted, she’d never said anything with such anger in her voice to him before, “What do you mean? It’s a two-way street Alex, Kara could always come visit if she wanted to. I’ve got my own city to protect too.”

He knew he’d made a mistake when her eyes narrowed slightly and she snorted, slowly doing a 360, taking deep breathes and rubbing the back of her neck before answering. Looking him dead in the eyes with a look so heated he wouldn’t have been shocked if heat vision suddenly shot out at him. “Honestly, why would she think she could come visit you? She landed on Earth the first thing you did was drop her off with a family she’d never met and fly off into the sunset. You didn’t warn her about the powers or give her advice on how to control them. Didn’t even tell her a phone number to call you at so she could ask.” Her voice was starting to raise slightly, which was much worse than the quiet one she’d been using up to that point.

He swallowed at the sting her words left. “I didn’t abandon her. I did what was best for her.”

“Yeah, and did you ever tell her that? Ever actually explain why the only family she had left up and left right after she’d lost her whole planet?” Alex said with a roll of her eyes. “You basically abandoned her for years on a world that she had no knowledge about and you wonder why she’s hesitant to come visit, or to call you more than once or twice a month? She doesn’t want to annoy you, doesn’t want to be a burden.”

He looked at her sharply, “She’s family, she could never be a burden.” He said with as much conviction as he could muster.

Alex nodded slightly, “Again, have you ever told her that?” His lack of immediate response seemed to be answer enough for her as she raised her eyebrows before continuing. “I’m not saying you aren’t important to her, because you’re family and she loves you. What I am saying is that you have a few options for the Lena situation right now.” Alex begin numbering his apparent options off on her fingers.

“One, you can raise a huge fuss about Kara and dating a Luthor, which will almost definitely alienate you from Kara. Two, you can say you’re happy for them and go back to Metropolis and simmer on just how unhappy you are about them until you explode, which will also probably alienate you from Kara. Or three, you can actually build a relationship with your cousin and get to know the woman who makes her happier than she has been since her pod landed. You can get to know Lena, not her name.” With her little speech done Alex goes back to leaning against the table. Clearly waiting for a response.

Clark was fairly stunned, it was clear Alex had thought this one through, had probably even figured he would come here when he found out about Kara and Lena. What Alex was saying was starting to really sink in. Because thinking back he’d really been freaking out when her pod landed. He’d just started to get settled into switching between Clark Kent and Superman. Settled into his relationship with Lois and suddenly there was this teenager literally crashing into his life.

He took a deep breath and looked toward Alex, “I don’t want to lose her Alex, I don’t think I can lose her. And you’re right, looking back I could have handled things a lot better then…and now. I didn’t realize she thought those things. And I didn’t realize how much I’ve been missing here. So, I am going to try for option number three.”

Alex accepted his answer with a quick nod, “Good, and since you’re already in National City I happen to know of a resident Kryptonian who solar flared yesterday and is bored out of her mind at home resting and probably wouldn’t mind a visit from her favorite cousin.” While she spoke Clark witnessed another seamless transition back into the Alex he’d known and dealt with for years. Slightly distant, but obviously caring. “Especially if said cousin brings pot stickers and pizza.” 

Clark raised his eyebrows slightly and smiled, “Fine I get it I’ll start today. Has anyone ever told you that you’re a little pushy sometimes?”

Alex reached for the door handle and smiled, “Oh Kara does during every sister night. You think she’d learn by know that I’m the more stubborn of the two of us.” 

“Yeah that’s the scary part,” Clark muttered as he followed her back to the atrium with the control platform and the balcony. Before they parted ways, he reached out and grabbed her arm lightly, “Hey Alex, thanks.” 

Alex only nodded, “That’s what family is for Clark, now get going or Kara will order lunch and your pot stickers and pizza will be for nothing.” She turned back to the platform. “Winn, that program better be done.” 

Clark went to the balcony and took off toward Kara’s apartment before realizing it had been so long he didn’t know where it was. So he took a second and listened for Kara’s heartbeat. It was pretty distinctive and when she’d first come to Earth he’d made a habit of listening for it. Once he found her he zoomed off in that direction, stopping at the closest restaurants to get the food before speed changing into jeans and a button-up and going up to her apartment. He knocked a little louder than usually, keeping in mind what Alex had said about her having solar flared the day before. 

When Kara opened the door she looked, less enthusiastic than usual, dressed in an oversized sweater that completely covered her hands, a pair of yoga pants, and a pair of pink fuzzy socks. She also wore a look of confusion for a moment before a smile split her face at the sight of the food in his arms. 

“Clark! What are you doing here? You or Lois always call before you make a trip to National City.” She ushered him in and took the food from him setting it on the counter before turning around to give him a hug. 

“I heard someone solar flared and I had a light day at work so I took the day to come see you instead.” He paused for a moment, “And I wanted to hear more about Lena, you were pretty tight lipped on the phone last night.”

Kara was getting plates and glasses from her cupboard while he was talking and slowed her motions at the mention of Lena. “To be honest you seemed pretty pissed, so I’m a little confused about the sudden appearance.” She steadily turned toward him as she spoke. 

“Kara I-”

“If you’re here to try and tell me what an awful person she is because of her last name and the family she had to grow up in then you may as well leave Clark, because I don’t have the energy for that argument today.” Clark really looked at his cousin, she didn’t sound surprised at his reaction, she was obviously mad at him for it. But she was also sad, and God it killed him a little. 

“Kara,” he said it gently, in a way that pulled her gaze from the plates she was setting on the counter to his face, “I didn’t come here to fight I came because you were right the last time I was here. Lena deserves to be judged on her own merits, not those of Lex or Lillian. I came because I wanted to hear more about her from you, and not through a phone.” He saw the tension leave his cousin’s shoulders and realized the toll their conversation must have taken on her last night on top of the solar flare. He went to sit down at the counter across from where Kara was literally stacking pizza on a plate for herself. “Now come on and share that pizza, Lois has been on a health kick lately and I am dying to eat some junk food.” 

Kara laughed and handed him the first stacked plate before filling another for herself and sitting next to him at the counter. “You’re really not mad?”

He opened his mouth but paused a second before answering, “I wasn’t the happiest but like I said I’m trying to judge her on her own merits. So, give me some merits to judge her on. I want to hear everything.” 

Kara grinned into her pizza before speaking, “She’s just, she’s so amazing. She’s got this massive company riding on her shoulders and you would never know the strain it is looking at her when she’s at work because she just makes it so effortless. And she’s kind, Clark the way she grew up and the family she grew up in should have made her cold and arrogant, but it didn’t. She has more compassion in her little finger than most people do in their whole bodies and she doesn’t even realize it. She tries so hard to make up for what Lex and Lillian have done, tries so hard to make sure people don’t just see her as a Luthor that she doesn’t see how much good she’s done in the world too. So, she’s continually trying to do more and more good. I just, I don’t know how I got so lucky to be her friend; dating her though, it feels like I hit the jackpot.” She looked back down at the pizza, still grinning.

Wow, his cousin really had it bad for Lena. And he felt like a complete dick. And idiot. “Kara, she sounds great. And she sounds like I really owe you an apology for last night.” Kara’s face whipped toward him, before he kept going. “I am so sorry I couldn’t see past her last name. And I’m sorry I didn’t trust you enough to know what and who is best for you. Not to mention I didn’t realize if she wasn’t trustworthy Alex would have made that very clear long before you told me.” 

She looked more than a little surprised at his apology, they didn’t really have talks like this. Their talks were generally revolved around being a Super, Lois or Alex, and joking conversations that revolved around nothing. They didn’t apologize to each other because there was rarely anything in their conversations to apologize for. 

Her eyes looked over his face a couple times, the crinkle in between her eyebrows lessening slightly before she said slowly, “Thank you Clark, that. That means a lot to me.”

They ate and kept talking, he asked her about everything he could think of Catco, Alex, her friends, how she was doing with sharing Alex with Maggie. There was so much he had no idea about. She’d never actually mentioned any of it the last time he’d been in town and he’d never thought to ask. 

After they polished off both the pizza and the pot stickers the two moved to Kara’s couch to keep talking and catching up. Attention shifted toward Clark and he found himself really trying not to close off details like he usually did. Clark rarely opened up to people, he had figured out years ago it was easier to just keep secrets than it was to tell half-truths. It was a hard habit to break, he could tell Kara noticed he was opening up more than usual and that made it worth the effort.

When the conversation hit a bit of a lull Clark cleared his throat, “Kara there’s something else I wanted to apologize for.” She straightened up a bit and that crinkle was back. “I’m sorry for abandoning you with the Danvers when you got to Earth. I’m sorry for not helping you through your powers. And I’m sorry for not being there for you much since then.” 

Clark held up his hand to stop Kara from interjecting, “Please, I just want to explain why. When your pod crashed I was just getting used to leading the double life of Superman and Clark Kent, was just getting my feet under me. I was just getting settled in my relationship with Lois. I finally felt like I was figuring my life out and suddenly this teenager literally crashes into my life. Speaking a language I had never spoken to anyone but a hologram, a teenager who was completely shell-shocked to see me not as a baby and who had just lost her whole world, her whole family.

“I freaked out, I had no idea how to raise a teenager. And I’d had no idea there was a possibility of anyone from Krypton surviving but me. I knew I couldn’t be the family you’d lost, knew I couldn’t be Krypton so I tried for the next best thing. I tried to find you a loving family who wouldn’t freak out like I had and Jeremiah and Eliza were at the top of the list in that category. I’d seen them with Alex, seen how good of a family they were and that was what I wanted for you Kara. Not just a cousin who was trying his best to figure it out, but a family.”

Clark was looking down and wringing his hands as he spoke, this was harder than he expected to talk about. “I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you couldn’t come to me, about powers, about Krypton, about life. I know I wasn’t there for you much and that’s on me, but Kara if you ever want to come to Metropolis you are more than welcome. Lois and I would love to have you anytime.” He looked up and held her gaze, “You are never a burden to me or Lois.” 

Kara looked at him, taken completely aback. And close to tears, “Clark, that is just about everything I have wanted to hear from you since you brought me to the Danvers. And you were right I had a great life with them, if you hadn’t put me with them I wouldn’t have Alex or Eliza. I might not even be Supergirl if not for them. But, why now? Why are you suddenly saying all this now?”

Clark looked back down at his hands and chuckled softly, “Something clicked and made me realize just how much I have been a dick to you in the past…and present. Got me thinking, about how it could have been if our roles had been reversed and I’d had to go through all of that on my own. I’m sorry Kara.” 

She reached out and pulled him into a hug, “It’s ok Clark, thank you for meaning all of that.” He could barely feel her hug without her powers behind it but that didn’t matter. They stayed in the hug for a couple more seconds before letting go. 

When Clark went to left Kara’s apartment a couple hours later he felt lighter than he had in a long time, Kara would be making it out to Metropolis in a couple weeks and he was already planning a trip for him and Lois back to National City next month to meet Lena. Life was looking up for the El family. Especially now that he was determined to be an actual family.  
“Hey Clark,” Kara’s voice turned him back around as he opened the door, “Was that ‘something’ that clicked happened to be named Alex?”

He smirked at his cousin, “Something’s name was definitely Alex.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hi friends, I hate that Clark basically has gotten off scot-free for straight up abandoning Kara for so long and suddenly this was born. Hope you enjoyed it, feel free to leave a comment or kudos saying as much if you did!  
> The title is a throwback to Taylor Swift because we stan one queen here.  
> Come shoot me an ask or just hang out on tumblr, prettypeary


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